Love you long time

Excuses, excuses!

Well, you know they're coming, in response to the terribly long time it's taken me to update. Ah heck, you know what? I'm not even gonna bother. I haven't had much to say, hence the lack of updatingness that's gone on, or hasn't gone on, on these pages.

I've been run off my feet trying to organise this law conversion. It's amazing how many phonecalls you have to make, how many forms to fill in, and all to give these people £8000 of your money to let you attend. What's with that? Very rarely do I beg to let me give someone more money than I currently have! But beg I shall. And i'm really looking forward to it. I've decided that i'm applying to Brookes, who's rated 4th best in the country, and Nottingham/Caplin law school in London rated top, then BPP in London, which is second or third, I can't remember which. I don't know whether to go full time or part time The full time is extremely hard, and i'm worried that because of the workload, my marks would be less than what they could otherwise be if I had more time. The problem with the part times in London though is that they get less teaching time than the full times, so in that way, my marks could also be compromised. I need to really consider this, and i'm considering applying for full time and part time and then just going for the one that accepts me.

So, that's what i've done all week. Admin, boring old form filling and telephoning. I spent most of yesterday being told that law firms wouldn't give me a work experience placement because all their places were full. I'd left it too late to apply. So i'll have to hope that that won't matter on the application, even though I suspect it will.

On Saturday I was teaching again, but I got a treat this time. One of my students is trained in Hopi Ear Candling, so I got her to give me a treatment. It was great. Imagine a tube of linen that's slightly tapered at one end. It's all coated in bees wax and the tapered end goes in your ear. As it burns, the warm air travels down into your ear, heating all the wax and junk that's in there. When it's soft and pliable, the candle acts kind of like a chimney and draws it all out. Now, I was dubious, I truly was, but it made a noticeable difference to my hearing. My right ear's terrible. I can't watch TV lying on my left side, because I have real trouble trying to make out what they're saying. On saturday night, this posed no problem at all. Apparently you need the treatments pretty frequently to begin with, to make the effects last, which is a real pity. It's something i'll definitely explore though.

And that's it. See why I left it so long to update? There's nothing really noteworthy happening at the moment. On Thursday, i'm going up to see mum for her birthday. I've ordered her present. Saw the perfect thing on Saturday, so now I just have to hope it's delivered on time. Knowing my luck with couriers, it'll come about 1 minute after i've left to catch the bus to see her. And no mum, I will not tell you what it is! Except that it's squidgy, yet, it's hard. Hah haha, I love driving her mad with wondering!

and, with that philosophical thought in mind, i'm off to eat chocolate!

Change ahoy!

Yep, that's right, you heard it here first! Carly has decided that it's time to change.

It's time to change from being a physio to being a hard nosed lawyer/barrister. Why, you ask, is this now so final? Well, let me tell you.

I went to Bath on Tuesday for that interview, which, as usual, meant hours of travelling in crappy weather, plus the expense of the journey, plus having to deal with a moody mutt who huffed because, "Rain makes my hair all wavey!" I got there, as usual, a little early. The interview was scheduled for quarter past 1. When half past had came and went, I naturally started to get a little concerned. But i was told to sit down and relax; they were running late. Wonderful. So I have someone waiting to give me a lift home, and they're already 15 minutes late. My interviews take ages as well, because of all the questions they like to ask about "how do you manage your working day, being blind and all."

So, I went in, did the interview, and came out thinking i'd done all right. They said there were 3 candidates after me, but that they would let me know by the end of the day. The phone call came less than an hour later. Quite frankly, I was surprised. They'd managed to interview 3 inside an hour, when the normal interview lasts half an hour, and when the next candidate hadn't even arrived by the time i'd left? Oh, and what's that? You had lunch as well? Hmmmm, I smell a rat, I do.

They gave me feedback, and you know the only reason I didn't get that job? Because I said that osteophytes result from rumatoid arthritis, and they felt they were more commonly associated with Osteoarthritis than Rheumatoid. Um, hello, they occur in both conditions! I also have a sneaking suspicion that I was prevented from doing a practical element of the interview. I heard one of the pannel tell the candidate before me to go across to out-patients and sign in there, but was I told to do it? Of course not!

So, i've had it. I know that the main reason i'm not getting jobs is because of the blindness. ok, I don't know it for sure, but i'm pretty damn sure it has a huge sway. That's the sixth interview that's given me an idiotic reason for my not getting the job. Friends have told me to fight it, to cry descrimination, to raise hell. But to be honest, I can't be bothered. How can you prove discrimination when the pannel insist they found someone better able to meet the needs of the post? how can you prove that they're nit-picking at everything to find the smallest of reasons why you shouldn't have the job? You can't, so I refuse to go there. I don't want to be seen as a whiner, in any case.

So i've done something about it.

This morning, I went on the Law Society's website, and got some really good information about courses. I didn't know it, but apparently you can do a conversion course inside a year, which enables you to practice law just as though you'd done a degree. The work's very hard, it's self funded, and Oxford don't offer the course which is a pity. But, the application deadline isn't until February, which means that I could potentially be starting in September. Or, I wait, hope that Oxford has clearing for law, put in an application, and start in September to complete a 2 year degree. This gives me a second BA to my name, and it means I can get a student loan to fund it. But it does take two years instead of 1, and there's the potential that I might not be able to start until 2010.

After the academic side, you have to train for 2 years on a practical level. The Barr course is so, so expensive, and competition is apparently fierce, but really, i'd want to be a barrister rather than a solicitor. That decision's at least 18 months off though, so i'm not worrying about it yet.

I've started the application to be accepted on the 1 year CPE/GDL course, but will apply to Oxford as well. So there you go. I've done it. And you know what? I'm happier today than I have been in months. Again, I have a chance to prove i'm not a failure. In the meantime, i'll keep applying for physio jobs, but only the ones I really want, instead of taking anything and everything that pops up. Law, here we come!

Things are looking up

Sorry there hasn't been an update in ages, but, to be honest, I just needed some 'me' time, and blog updates aren't as important as that. Well, i'm back on track at last. I've been able to reconcile last week and move on. The Birmingham people phoned me on Friday to tell me I hadn't got the job either, but i expected it, given that even their shortlist consisted of 64 interview candidates.

I've started planning for the future though. Yes, I want to work as a physio, I truly do, but to be brutally honest with you, and myself, I don't see it happening, not in the NHS anyway. I think, given the competition, that someone at a disadvantage is never ever ever going to be chosen for employment, given the many hundreds they can take their pick from. So i'm once again looking into law. Yep, it's a bit of a change I know, but at least then i'd have a good excuse to argue! I've considered law for years. It was either medical or law, right the way through school, but medical was my first love so it won out. I've decided that I will keep applying for jobs, but that i'm also putting in my UCAS form for 2010 to go back and study. I'm gutted. I've just missed the deadline for this years' application, so i'll have to wait. Oxford has offered me a fast track degree, so i can do law in 2 years, rather than 3. Sounds good to me.

I've spent a manic weekend as well. on Friday, I had to leg it to the bank to deposit money for my laptop before it closed. Then Saturday was given over to JP's mum's birthday. She'd booked a 'surprise trip', and wouldn't tell any of us where we were going. Now, it was an interesting day... Yes, interesting is the only word which quite sums it up. What with her sons and daughters, their partners and their kids, there was 11 of us going on a train. Had she reserved seats? of course not. Was the train back travelling during the commuter time rush? of course it was! So, we got split up, but all of us managed to get on the train, even if Molly did try and perform an acrobatic leap of at least 20 feet to follow the kids onto a different carriage. She was still attached to her lead, so you can imagine how funny it was. Heh, I nearly fell, and then, because the lead snapped her back, she thought i'd given her a correction. That resulted in a strop which lasted for most of the morning. She wouldn't look at any of us, and it was like dragging a suitcase. Ie, trying to make her walk alongside us resulted in an ongoing tug of war, with her standing still at one end of the lead, and me heaving with all my might on the other end.

When we'd got to Birmingham, mummy, as she shall be called to preserve anonymity, gathered all of us around her, and, with much holding of breath and dramatic pauses, announced that we all were going to......... Sea World! Can you imagine my excitement? Wow! I was going to a place full of fish! What? I can't see them? I won't enjoy myself? oh, don't be silly. Of course i'll enjoy walking through a very dark area, touching the odd bit of glass, imagining the water and fish behind it, and struggling to get through the place because it's too dark for my almost blind friend to see properly. Yep, I can't imagine a better way to spend my Saturday! I said nothing though. At the end of the day, it was her birthday, and, if she enjoyed it, I was definitely going to pretend that I did! After 3 and a half hours though, the plastic smile was really starting to make my jaws ache, and I couldn't think of any more ways to say how interesting everything was. Thankfully, at that point, we left.

Left, to walk along a canal and find a 'hand made burger' place. Well, the burgers were so hand made that they couldn't give me one that didn't have salad on it. "Oh, they're already made up, and there's no button on the till to tell them to give you one without salad." The burgers too were, erm, interesting. The charcoal tasted great. The chips were gorgeous though. So then, after the lovely food, it was time to walk, or should that be swim, to the train station. The rain was fierce, but, thankfully, we didn't get lost on the way. I was petrified though. We walked along the canal and, in some places, the streets are very, very narrow. I was walking on the side of the canal, with a fella who was struggling to see. i swear, I had visions of me having to choke up from the depths, raincoat only slightly more wet than it already was, to return to my walk. Thankfully, it didn't happen though.

Having got to the train station, we even found the right platform; no mean feat in Birmingham New Street's huuuuge railway station. When the train turned up, mummy seemed surprised that it was so packed that we could barely stand, never mind sit. Most of them did end up in seats though, but me, JP and his little nephew ended up in first class. Nobody would move from the disabled areas, so I just thought, "Oh, sod it. The dog's been stood on too many times already. Let's go and live the good life!" Even first class didn't have enough seats for us all, but Molly thought this was great. She had floor company, in the form of JP's nephew. poor lad. In the end, Molly was sprawled half across his lap, and half on the floor. All sulking had disappeared. I guess that the importunings for tummy tickles were dealt with in a manner she found highly appropriate.

Mummy invited us round to her house for drinking, but, after a half an hour's wait, then a bus journey, all in the cold, my back was aching so bad that I just told her flat out, i wasn't going. I don't think I could have pretended for much longer anyway.

Yesterday, as JP isn't going to be here on the day of her birthday due to work, we took her to a Chinese restaurant. The food was gorgeous, and, wonder of wonders, I didn't come home with various different coloured sauce-juice-rice stains liberally adorning my rather nice blouse. I slept like a trooper last night too. Couldn't even keep it together until 9 o'clock. Oh dear, oh dear, i'm getting old!

This morning started in the usual way. Up by 8, feed the beast, job hunt, then pass time until the next job hunt. I have an interview in Bath tomorrow, so we'll see if they surprise me by even considering me for the job.

I've had enough

I truly have. I hate job hunting with a passion. You're gonna get no humor from me today, just a healthy big dose of good old cynicism.

You remember that job I said I loved so much? The one where the staff seemed to really gel with me? The one I was almost certain to get? Surprise, surprise. I didn't get it. What was the reason? Well, as usual, there was none given, other than that, "Oh, it was a strong field, and unfortunately, we felt that another fitted the needs of the post better than you." Do you know how sick I am of hearing that? I'm bone weary of it. I'm so disappointed in fact, that I feel physically ill. How much more of this can I take? How many more rejections, before I throw my hands up in the air and say, "Right, that's it. I've had enough." Will tomorrow's rejection from Birmingham be the straw that breaks the camel's back? I'm frightened now. I don't want to not work. I don't want to give up wanting to look for jobs. But today, right now, I just feel so useless. I feel as though the whole effort of job hunting is just so fruitless, so pointless. Why keep putting myself out there, psyching myself up, when each and every time i'm bound to fail? Why do it, when it's wrecking my self-confidence? 5 interviews now. I've had 5, and all bar one haven't even bothered to give me a good reason why they're not employing. I'm very near that, "I've had enough," point, and it's scaring me.

Birmingham went well, although that means nothing, right? They said they'd let me know before the end of the week, but, as they're interviewing 64 candidates over 2 days, i'm not holding my breath while i wait to be offered the job... I don't want to suffocate.

That's it for today. Enjoy my depression... I'm not.

Update, at last!

Well, i'm disillusioned with the whole blog thing, mainly because I never seem to have time to update any more, but also because I don't know if anyone's even bothering to read it. I hope someone is... occasionally even would be good!

It's been that long since I updated that I can't remember half of what i'm supposed to tell you. I managed to get a lift part of the way home from London on Friday though, which was nice. I was still really really tired at that point, and everything was getting to me. I was fed up, tired of running around, sickk of being in the red with the bank, and really worried about my Granny, who's really not well at the minute. of course, because I was tired, everything was magnified right out of proportion. I came home, got dinner, did my job hunt on the computer, and then just forced myself to get into bed. It took ages, but eventually I did sleep, and got about 6 or 7 hours uninterrupted. Of course, that meant I slept fitfully for the rest of the night, but i didn't mind it so much.

I don't have a clue what I did on Saturday. I can't remember at all, but i suspect most of it was spent prepping for the job interview I had coming. on Sunday, I had to travel down there. Thankfully, that friend of mine had agreed to be my PA for the interview, which was great, because there was a practical element. So we travelled down together, and spent a night in the greatest of hotels, commonly known as the Travel Lodge. If you've ever stayed there, you'll know how special it is! A word to the wise though. The Little Chef, at 9 o'clock is not to be tampered with. It really doesn't go down well as a late night dinner, and it's so expensive too! Cost us £23 for scampy and chips and chicken and chips. What a rip off!

Monday was great though. I got up really early so that i'd be awake and ready for the day. Putting on my old tracksuit bottoms and chavvy white polo shirt was such a blast from the past though. I never thought i'd wear my uni clothes in propper practice, but here I was, on the way to an interview, dressed in clothes that are actually super comfortable.

As soon as I got there I knew i'd love the place. People are usually really snooty when I rock up with the dog and a suitcase or small rucksack. Thing is though, when you travel with a hound, you can't travel light. You've got to bring food, bowls for food and water, and even a bed for her, if we're staying out all night. But these folk were great. They didn't mention the case, other than to commiserate on how much I had to carry. They even took Molly, and spoiled her rotten all day while I was working with the kids.

So, dog-less, suitcase-less, and with one more assistant than i'd had a minute before, I went to begin my interview. There were four of us being interviewed that day, with more to come the day after. I'd been allocated the second youngest group of kids, who were all around the age of 5. This is my favourite age to work with them at, so I was more than pleased. Any younger, and they're moody and difficult to handle. Much older, and they start to wonder why I have to touch them so much, when the other therapists don't. This leads to lengthy explannations of, "My eyes are broke. It happened in my mummy's tummy." But of course, the 'why' questions never stop there, do they? I went in when they were doing a task series; a programme of activities designed to give them transferrable movement skills that they can use elsewhere. Yesterday, we were looking at going to the doctor, and they were practicing getting on and off the bed, pulling themselves into different positions, rolling and that sort of thing. We also got used to showing the doctor our tummies, and working out that it wasn't scary to get touched there. In fact, sometimes it was quite nice, as my little boy thought when i tickled him. He was super cute, actually. He had one of those very infectious baby laughs, and the most gorgeous fat little belly, just right for tickling. He also sang with gusto, which was great, as not many of the other kids could sing, due to the effects of the CP.

Once they were done, I had a quick tour of the school, and then it was back to the group to help with an English lesson. This involved teaching one of the girls how to use switches to access a computer. The computer systems available are so complex now. There's one that even tracks the direction your eyes are looking, so you don't need to toggle switches or anything. this set up was very simple; a switch for cycling through choices, and another for selecting the one you wanted. But the therapy centred around getting the movement coordinated and precise enough to use the system properly. She was a smart one, grasping the concept behind the switches very, very quickly. But, sad to say, I missed the end of the story about Daisy and her pet dinosaur, Thingy. How gutted was I when I had to grab a quick lunch before my interview! Lasagne, or Daisy? Oh, the difficulty of the choice!

We got free lunches. Apparently, it's a perk of being staff or a guest that you get free hot food. Good system, I say! After eating quickly, I ran down and got changed in the changing room set aside for us, namely the disabled toilet in reception. Thankfully though, there wasn't the usual wee puddle on the floor, so I changed into decent interview clothes without fear of contamination from nuclear spillages.

The interview went so well. I had them all laughing, and even agreeing with my philosophy behind work. Honestly, if I don't get the job, there's nothing I can specifically point out that caused the failure. The staff liked me, the kids liked me, and the therapists were comfortable enough to just leave me with a child to get on with their lesson. That, to me, speaks volumes.

I was a bit naughty though. I came out of the interview and got chatting to the next one to go in, who was very, very nervous. i said things like, "oh, don't worry about it. They're all really nice. You've got the principle and the vice principle, the head of the physio department, and the head of another department. They're all very influential people, but honestly, don't worry!" and, "Oh, rest easy. The questions are really easy. *pause for thought*. Ok, so most of them are easy, but you'll manage. Oh, what's that you say? your mind goes blank at a difficult question? Honestly, most of them are fine. There's only the odd stonking one." Oh, aren't I bad!

I felt a bit guilty for it as I left, but if I can sabotage one interview, that's one less candidate I have to worry about. They seemed to really like me though, so, as I said, i'm hopeful.

Took me 4 and a half hours to get home, and by the time i'd got in, all I wanted was sleep. I threw some chips in the oven, then discovered that Tesco thick cut chips are too horrible to be enjoyed. I ate a couple, then did a job hunt, and went to bed.

This morning was spent getting ready for the interview in Birmingham tomorrow. A friend who worked there a while back says it's a really really good hospital, so now I just have to hope that things go as well tomorrow as they went yesterday. Wish me luck!

The morning after

Is just as tiring as the night before, actually. I'm shattered today, truly shattered. I haven't slept properly in about a week now, and it's really telling on me. I'm hoping that i'll eventually get so tired that I just have to sleep, and sleep it out.

So, what did I do yesterday? I started by being awake at 6, as per usual, and feeling super tired without being able to sleep. Why, I ask you! I dragged myself up, went downstairs, and nearly caused my dear, OLD, dad to die suddenly of a heart attack. He's convinced I don't get up early, even though I do. I think he thinks i'm still one of those teens who lies in bed all day long. So, after we'd resussed him (don't panic, it was my mum giving the mouth to mouth. I'm not quite that far gone yet), I threw myself in the shower, and then multitasked by feeding dogs, packing bags and dressing self all at the same time. Aren't I clever?

My new laptop is so yummy! Honestly it is. It's so great to be able to have a laptop that's small and light enough to hold in one hand! But i'm off on a tangent. Sorry, it was packing bags that made me remember how much i'm in love with it.

Mum had a client assessment to do, so I thought i'd come along and watch. It was interesting, actually, even if the travelling did take up the better part of the day. But it's nice to travel with someone you can talk to, and who buys you lunch!

She left me though, abandoned me on a tube station platform as she had done before, many many years ago. Ok, it was a tube, not the platform. And there is a story behind the abandonment comment which, if you have a sick sense of humor like us, is very, very funny. We once told this tube guy that i'd got off the tube too early, as a young child. Mum's blind too, so it was understandable that she searched for, and couldn't find me. So she left me and went on home.

Tube guy: So how did you find each other again?
Me: Oh, we just bumped into each other, literally, when I was 16. Funnily enough, it was on a tube platform!

We found it so amusing because he actually believed us. I mean, who in their right mind would believe that tale? But it seems, if you're blind, that in the eyes of Joe Public, you're beyond falsehood. You're just to innocent, too perfect, too crippled to lie! No disabled person knows how to fib now, do they! It's fun to push things to the boundary of believeableness though, and actually, this one started out as a gentle tease of the man. i cant remember what he asked initially, but the story kind of made itself up after that.

Anyway, i'm off on a tangent again. After i'd been cruelly abandoned, for the second time I might add, I trailed my miserable self across London to Andy's rather large flat in a scummy old student halls block of even scummier, and very tiny, rooms. He's the warden, so he gets it posh, you know. It was fun catching up with him, even though he's a man, and therefore slightly more uninteresting than the fairer sex. I made allowances, though. He even fed me! Yes, that's right ladies and gentlemen, a man fed a woman without being asked... more than twice... And it was kebab he fed me, cooked by his own fair hand. Hmmmm, i'll amend that. i don't like lying to you, dear reader. He brought it, with his own fair hand, from the car of the delivery driver. He even put it on a plate! Now, who needs more in life when you have a man like that?

Of course, becuase he talked so much, we were about 15 minutes late starting our broadcast. what! It's a known fact that men talk too much! and no, I do not have shifty eyes, nor was I hurriedly gulping down the last bit of kebab as we went on air. So no, it wasn't my fault we were late!

We had tuns of requests in though, and MSN was absolutely crazy all night. It was such good fun. I'd like to do it more often, and perhaps I just will. Even my mum, the oldie, said she enjoyed it. But then, who wouldn't when we're both making absolute idiots out of ourselves, trying to impersonate an intellectually challenged brummy?

At 1, we were finished, and about half an hour after, I flaked and begged for bed. But we sat talking for ages and ages, and, you know when you get so tired that everything seems funny and you laugh hysterically even if someone says hello? I was in that head space for about half an hour last night. Everything, and I mean everything was just so hugely amusing! My belly hurts this morning.

I eventually fell asleep, only to be woken by the sounds of water, and brushing! I still haven't worked out what it was, but I think it might have been someone cleaning the side wall of the building. After that, I just couldn't settle back to sleep again, hence the reason i'm killing time whilst writing this post. It's all quiet, apart from the dogs not being able to decide whether they want to keep me company, or try to pester the still sleeping Andy. The quiet is also shattered by the occasional snorting snore from next door. Anyway, I suppose I should go feed the beasts. They're girning for it. So, see you next time.

Tired

I don't seem to be anything other than tired lately. It's doing my head in, actually for, as well as being tired, I can't seem to sleep at night. I'm sitting here, in my mum's house. It's not even 10 at night, and already i'm almost weeping for my bed. Isn't that pathetic? I must be getting old, and I don't like it!

So, what of me? What have I been up to, you might wonder? If you're pondering this, then I think you have too much time on your hands, but i'll tell you anyway.


Monday started with me in a bath robe, feeling tousled and sleepy, having been woken at an unearthly hour of the morning by the combination of my very noisy friend leaving for work, and Molly kangaroo bouncing all over him to tell him how desperately she wanted to go too. The tail was the thing that woke me, slapping off the wall of the bedroom with enough force to make a small area of Oxfordshire wonder if they were experiencing a minor earthquake. I didn't kill dog or man, for which fact I still hold quiet pride. I even smiled a good morning as I grunted something about sleep and me going well together. As I sat there in my robe, wishing, with head in hands, for a return of the blissful silence, the bombshell hit. The courier was coming with the laptop. Great, so now I have to get dressed.

With much grumbling about the necessity, i complied with the urgings of my subconscious which focused on things like, "You don't want to open the door in a robe," and, "Really, it's too cold to flash your legs at the neighbours when you take in your parcel." Jeans and a T-shirt quickly put paid to these notions, and i was able to relax... For a long, long time! At 3, I considered calling them, and, as usual, as soon as I picked up the phone, unleashed my temper, and got all worked up for a good, cracking, satisfying shouting match with the same customer services rep, the door went. Yep, it was my laptop.

It's lovely actually, even though, due to its size, it takes a little extra care to type on. It's an MSI Wind, and it's scrummy. Light, shiny, and with a running temperature of less than blistering proportions, it was my instant love. We're so attached. It's even on my lap, right now, cuddling nicely as I type. Wait, am I allowed to say that it's on my lap? PG ratings, PG ratings! And cuddling? How rude!


I was supposed to pack a bag to go up to my mum's on Monday, but, as usual, I procrastonated until I couldn't face it. Instead, I was up at 7 this morning, and in the bath. It was even too early to sing songs like Mamma mia, shock horror. I'd been a bit of a scaredy cat the night before, so I kept the TV on so that i wasn't too scared to sleep. Yes, I know i'm an idiot. But the end result was that i didn't get much sleep at all. I then packed a bag in record time, and was so pleased to realise that my now tiny tiny light laptop would fit in a small rucksack with the rest of my clothes. Bliss! I hightailed it off to the train station then. Well, that was the intention, but Molly saw to it that it didn't work! I was late for the bus, and arrived, as usual, just as it sailed past me. So I stood, waiting on the next one for far too long. On the way to the station, there's 4 roads we have to cross. Usually, Molly's so good at finding the poles of the traffic lights for me, but today? "Oh, oh, oh, there's a person watching me! Oh, and they've even made eye contact. That must mean i'm gonna get a fuss, right? now, let''s just forget about this silly old pole, eh? It doesn't stroke me, and it doesn't smell even a little bit like food. Yes, let's turn so that I can look at the person while SHE thinks i'm trying hard to find the pole. If i wag a little too, SHE'll think i'm trying real hard, and won't even shout at me! What? I'm facing the wrong way? Well of course I am! I don't want to go to the train station, stupid."

We got there in the end, but it took a lot of bullying from me, and huffing from her in the meantime. instead of finding the help desk, we sailed straight to the barriers, which really didn't help, as the train was in and i needed to let the help desk know i'd need met at Paddington. I begged help off a random member of staff, and made that train by the skin of my teeth, with much cursing of dogs and their mood swings. The trip through London was uneventful, and surprisingly smoothe. Met up with my mum, and a few friends of ours for lunch and we ended up having a huge philosophical conversation which dealt with light matters such as: the validity of religion, is maths a belief system, can the belief behind science be compared with that of religion, and other such usual lunch time ramblings. Then the dogs went to the park. Molly was a silly, yet again. She wouldn't pick up a ball that mum chucked for her, regardless of how much coaxing I gave. After we'd lost the second, i gave up on that game.

Then it was time to find coffee. My mum's a coffee adict, and there's a helth shop that does a nice blend, apparently. We got lost a couple of times but, being the nice daughter that I am, I didn't even complain! After that, it was a trip home on the tube, then a dinner of gorgeous macaroni and chicken in a white sauce. I'm still stuffed.

And now, to finish, some exciting news! I'm going to be on Andy's radio show on Thursday night from 10. I expect you all not only to listen, but to add thestudio@smogradio.net to your IMs, and write in to pester me while I enjoy my 3 hours of fame! Yes folks, get ready to ask for my autograph. You can find the show at www.smogradio.net

I'm too tired to write more, so i'm off for a sleep. Catch you later.

Dog foods and laptops

I'm tired as I write this, so please forgive any unusually stupid writings you see on this post. The usual idiocy is to be expected, i'm afraid.

Well, it hasn't been a good week for deliveries for me. I was supposed to get dog food yesterday, which arrived at 2 O'clock today. I'd also ordered a laptop. Why? I'll tell you why. List of problems with my old laptop.

1. Battery doesn't work. It won't even hold a second of charge. as soon as you pull the plug, the thing shuts down as though there were no battery in it.

2. Charger. It doesn't connect so well any more since some idiot stood on it, pulling it out of the back of the laptop.

3. Wire. It's broken a little where it attaches to the charger itself. I've selotaped it to within an inch of its life, but it's only a patch up job, really. That comes with making your charger travel to and from work every day. Who ever said laptops were designed to be portable!

4. Screen. The plastic housing's readily peeling away from the edges of it now.

5. Heat. Yes, that's right, even my laptop's hot! So hot, in fact, that it can blister your thighs through jeans, and the plastic tray it's sitting on, because it was too hot to sit on your knee and you thought it would run cooler if the air vents were free. Can you tell i've had that experience?

So, yes, all things considered, it was time i got a new one. i used some of my precious savings for it... At least, i will have, once I put them in the bank. I can just hear my bank manager screaming as my overdraught grows right before his beady little eyes.

They told me, when i bought it, that it would be delivered today. So I sat in all day... again. And it didn't come! At 3, I phoned them, only to be told that, "No, we wouldn't have told you it would be delivered so quickly, because it's having a memory refit. It won't be with you till Monday." I blew up when they called me a liar, and demanded the refund of my delivery costs. They, of course, refused. "Oh, I can't do that. It would have to be my manager, and she's not available." So, being the nice, calm, mild tempered person that I am, I demanded a call back and told her that, if I didn't get it within 24 hours, i was cancelling the order and telling my bank it was fraud. Let's see if they call back, shall we? I'm thinking they probably will!

And that's the only thing of any interest that happened me today. Oh, except for the fact that i'm now going to have to cancel some consultancy work I had booked for Monday, all because I have to sit in all day... Again, to wait for the laptop... again. What fun!

I'm teaching hot Stone massage tomorrow and Sunday, and that usually makes me quite tired, so you won't hear from me until Monday in all likelihood.

Don't scare the children too much tonight. All right, do it, but i want to hear the stories!

Loose interpretation

Well, I was right to warn you to interpret 'tomorrow' loosely, wasn't I? Just pretend you don't see the date on the top of this post, and it'll all run smoothely from there.

Now, for the next exciting installment. Prepare yourself, for it's a thrilling ride this time. There's implements of torture and everything.

The day was the usual hum-drum feed the dog, walk the dog, brush the dog, pick up dog poo, clean the house, look for jobs, kind of affair that it always is... With one exception. Cue scary Jaws music, for, it was time to go to the doctor! Yes, that's right folks, Carly was voluntarily walking to a slow painful death by flu jab. I hate them, I really do, and they make me cringe even more, now that I know the damage they do.

It actually wasn't a doctor, but a nurse doing the pricking. Stop sniggering; she was female! So, i sat there, perfectly still, even managing to contain the screams of deepest agony which wanted to burst from my obediently compressed lips, and imagined what that injection was doing to me. They inject the fluid directly into the deltoid muscle; the chief instigator in you lifting your arm away from your side. When something's pushed into a muscle, you get micro tears. As fluid is definitely a something, and a quite large something at that, I grimaced as I thought of the thousands of tiny little scars i'd get as a result, and how they would impair the muscle's ability to function. I was therefore unsurprised when she warned that my arm was likely to feel a bit tender for a week or so. Yes, i'm a physio; I know the damage you've just willingly and knowingly done to my muscle! And i don't like it!

Didn't do much in the evening, apart from eat gorgeous pasta in a mushroom and wine sauce. Well, it was supposed to be gorgeous, but i forgot about the sauce, so it was far too thick and gloopy. I then roleplayed until the crack of dawn, but I blame Andy's radio show for that. It was good last night.

I woke up this morning with a throbbing left arm, a sore back, and a myriad of other tiny aches. I dragged myself out of bed long enough to feed the dog, fully intending to get straight back in, when I remembered I was having dog food delivered. I was afraid of missing the courier, so sat up instead. I did make one concession to my poorly state though; I stayed in jammies. Well, might as well give the man a show when he comes to the door! I've felt really sick all day, but again, i'm not surprised. For about three days after the jab, I feel really pants, and not myself at all. I felt so ill this morning that I had to force myself to eat breakfast. I had some good company on MSN to distract me though, and managed to get through the rest of the day. Did the courier come? But of course he did! Not. So now I have one hungry dog, and only enough food for one more day. He'd better come soon or else my life might be in danger... Or my bones will be, at least.

Time for a newsflash. You know the potato peeler I was going on about the other day? That nice, snazzy electric one that makes peeling spuds as easy as shelling peas? Well, I decided to try it out with that shepherd's pie i've been threatening to make. Oh, it worked so well! It vibrated so much that I couldn't feel where skin ended and tender tatie flesh began. My hands aren't the largest in the world, so I already find it difficult to hold potatoes and use the fingers on that hand to find the skin. With this vibrating monster in my hand *the potato peeler, you dirty minded reader!* I could hardly even keep my grip on the potato! So I reluctantly threw it across the room and reverted to terribly old fashioned physical effort to peel them instead. And you know what? It worked! So i'm writing this with a bellly full of a very good pie.

I think i'm gonna go up and broadcast with my mate on his show at some point next week. We have this ongoing joke of husband and wife, so we're planning to do a Richard and Judy style broadcast. Or is that Punch and Judy? Andy, don't get any ideas into your head, for in this show, Judy beats Punch! I'll let you know dates so that my rabid fan base may choon in and listen. Yes, I did write 'choon'. The kids tell me it's the new, hip, way of spelling it, and I do so wish to keep up with these new fads. Don't you? Until next time, let me leave you with this little pearl of wisdom.

A woman who thinks she is equal to a man...
Is lacking ambition!

Thank you, Mae West.

Sleeping

Why this for a title? Because that's all i've seemed to do for the last couple of days.

I blame it on the travelling! Well, I actually suspect it's the winter hybernation bug biting me again. This happens every year. In the summer, I turn into an insomniac, surviving quite happily on about 3 hours of sleep. In the winter, I could sleep the clock round and still feel tired. It's odd.

I spent most of Sunday in bed, and this I blame on a really good book. You remember the one that kept me awake a couple of nights ago? It took me nearly a whole day, but I finished it. If you haven't done so already, you really need to read Robert Jordan's 'Wheel of Time' series. It's very long and involved, but so well written, and the character development's excellent.

I eventually dragged my bones out of bed long enough to throw some chips in the oven for dinner. No fancy Sunday roasts this week!

Ah, in fact, my bad memory's playing tricks again! That was Saturday that I was lazy because, on Sunday, I went shopping. How could I forget such a momentus event!

Yep, it was time to buy interview clothes, so off I traipsed to Next. I love shopping here, even if it means visits are infrequent because of the price of everything. It is amazing how much people will pay for clothes. But I did need something new for interview. The suit I had was years old and I had to kind of keep my elbows bent a little bit to make sure the arms of the jacket looked long enough. I've gone for a slightly less power dressing look this time. I'm wearing nice smart trousers, and a smart shirt, but no suit, no matching jacket. I think it's a better image to portray, bearing in mind the job market i'm trying to appeal to. It looks a lot more approachable; a little softer.

Because the clothes were on offer, I was able to get 2 of these outfits, plus new shoes. I even got a new dressing gown! And all courtesy of a friend who decided that they wanted to spoil me on their credit card. I felt a bit guilty, as there's no way i'd have chosen two outfits if i'd known someone else was going to be paying. But I paid them back by making dinner for us when I got home. Don't ask me what I had, because I can't remember. Old age again... Oh, is that a pee stain on my sofa?

Yesterday was pretty uneventful. Because i'd set aside that money for clothes, I was able to go down town and get a couple of bits and pieces I needed for my kitchen. No more using tongs where, every minute you're holding the meat in them, you're praying that the handle doesn't fall off... again! I also got a silicon version of a wooden spoon, and they're brilliant. I had one before, and they're excellent, because they don't take the teflon off the pan, they don't scrape it, and they don't go all splintery and horrible after the first wash.

I got one of those new nifty electric potato peelers. The blade vibrates a little on them, so that it slides through the spud easier. For any Irish who subsides solely on a diet of taties, it's a must, and is sitting proudly resplendent on my kitchen worktop, just begging to be used. I think i'll make a Shepherd's Pie today, so that i can test it out. I absolutely hate peeling potatoes because it takes so long, so hopefully this'll make it a little less arduous.

So that's it. nothing more to tell. oh, except that a Turkish friend of mine's going into the army apparently. I didn't hear it from the horse's mouth though, so all I know is that he's going in the winter. I don't know how long for, or where he'll be posted, but, let the worry begin. Army's tough on the boys and the country law states that every single one of them has to be conscripted. If they've gone through uni, it can be for as little as 6 months, but this is at the government's discression. If they haven't had the benefit of a good education, which most of them haven't, it's an 18 month stint, complete with mind numbing drugs and hard work. Luckily, Abuzer's done uni, so i'm hoping the government will give him a short shift.

Today, I plan to be lazy, and not to look at the state of my bank account! It's frightening! Until tomorrow. Please interpret that term loosely!

Normality reigns once more

And, I am even glad of it! I haven't updated in a couple of days, firstly because I was shattered after the journey back, and secondly because, when I got home, there was a nice little surprise waiting for me. The batteries in the wireless keyboard had gone done. I *coughs* borrowed, my friend's really terribly awful keyboard, and was forced to subsist on substandard stolen goods for a whole day. It was terrible to type on, and I couldn't face posting my usual long-winded ramblings via the thing. I've already told you of my previous technical problems with the pen, so I wasn't going there again!

So, what to tell this time? Prepare yourself for the usual brand of sarcasm, general pesimism *is that how you spell it?* and edge of your seat, pants wetting type of excitement.

I got up at stupid o'clock on Wednesday morning to get back on my chosen flight, chosen, I might add, for the possibility that I might make that memorial service on time. So I sacrificed most of a good night's sleep for nothing! 6 was the time of my rather rude awakening (yes, my mobile is considered rude when it warbles the 'get up, get up now!' noise at me at that time of the morning). It was harder to get my granny up than it was to drag my bleary-eyed, wobbly-legged carcus out of the all too comfortable bed. I'm reading a good book, so had spent most of the night with my nose buried in it. I'd got maybe 5 hours of sleep at a push, and now it was time to trek halfway across the universe, all in the name of returning to oxford.

I pulled myself together in time to feed the dog before we left, and then worried the whole way up the road to the airport that she'd chuck up all over my aunty's car. You're supposed to leave them for at least 20 minutes after feeding before you do anything with them, but extra time was a luxury I didn't have, thanks to my need to get as much sleep as possible, and leave the getting up as close to departure time as I could.

Once Molly realised that her new love interest, the lodger, was howling his misery at her departure in his bedroom instead of coming with us, she huffed mightily! Ok, he was snoring his displeasure... And she knew it! If a dog could flounce, old Molly would have done it as she threw her food engorged body into the car, and turned her back on us all. Clearly, she thought we were terribly unjust in parting her from her newfound love. Even my aunty, who she usually goes mad for, couldn't bring her out of this latest strop.

So, we travelled to the airport in sulky silence, if the loud groans, snorts, and general vocalising of her displeasure are discounted. We actually arrived early in the end, despite my mad scramble to locate my iPod which my Granny was convinced was a phone. She'd taken it downstairs and tried to plug it into my phone charger for me. I'm just thankful the connections didn't match, or else my Pod would be no more, given the difference in voltages.

And what better way to make up the time we had until the flight left than having an Ulster Fry? For those of you who have never had one, it consists of bacon, fried eggs, sausage, vegetable roll which is meat, not vegetable (Nope, I never claimed the Irish were logical!), soda bread, potato bread, mushrooms, beans, and tomato. I didn't have all that, but the prices were extortionate! £7.99 for the fry.

The flight was pretty good, apart from the landing. It was done so badly that we bounced off the runway before touching down properly. Molly didn't like it. It's the first time i've seen her really bothered on a flight, but she wouldn't settle at all after that, and nearly strangled herself pulling to get off. Then I had to convince the guy helping me that the suitcase i'd said was mine, truly was mine. he kept glancing at the bag tag on my passport, then the tag on the bag. "Oh, they don't match!" "Yes, mister, I know they don't. That's because they didn't give me a new tag at check in. Honestly, the case is mine." "Oh, but i have to put it back. We can't be sure it's yours, and the numbers don't match." Well, it went round in circles, until I lost the rag, ripped open the top of the suitcase, and flashed the contents at him. "Yep, sir, it's mine all right! Those are my pants!" He didn't really see them, but wouldn't it have been funny if he did! The clothes were all zipped away, so all he got was an eyeful of boots, handbags, and girlie purfume.

I'd had a phone conversation with my mum earlier in the day, who suggested the bright idea of getting the bus home instead of the train. The only reason I hadn't done it on the way up was because it took over an hour longer. But, when she told me it had electric, and wireless internet, I just couldn't resist. All excited i was as I made my way to the terminal, and even Molly was happy, for a wonder. I climbed on the bus, completely content in the fact that i'd be totally amused on the way home, and blissfully unaware that, by the usual cruel twist of fate, I had one of the very few buses which didn't possess the technological knowhow to have electricity, let alone internet access!

So there I was, stuck for about 4 hours on a bus, with nothing to do except resort to phone, ahem, i mean iPod, for amusement. I get real bad cabin fever if i'm forced to sit still for more than 3 hours. It's almost a panic i get into. So I really didn't enjoy knowing that i'd be stuck there for that length of time.

When I eventually did get off, I can tell you, I was glad! I arrived home after having travelled for 10 hours, but my day wasn't over. A friend was doing a radio show, which you should listen to, by the way. www.smogradio.net. he broadcasts between 10 and 1, and is a nice background distraction to whatever you're doing.

So I didn't get to bed for ages! Then iwas up with the dog at the usual time, and I think she must have been shattered herself. After i'd fed her, she crawled back into bed. So it was only natural that i followed suit! It was freezing yesterday. From getting up at 8, I didn't get my feet warmed back up again until after 11. then it was up, breakfast, and job hunting. I didn't do much else yesterday, but I did find a job to apply for, which is good. I didn't make it right through to the end of the radio show last night, and i slept late this morning. But I made up for my sins in a sinfully, deliciously long bath when I woke up. I further compounded my hanus crimes by having a whole bar of chocolate for breakfast!

I've been invited to interview in Selly Oak hospital on the 11th of next month, so things are looking up. Today, I have no plans really, but i think i'll teach myself the way to Tesco I don't know if this is a good thing though; me having access to a readily available chocolate supply... Well, that's it for today. I have things to do you know! Until next time, whenever that may be.

Country roads, take me home

Doesn't quite sound the same when you sing, "country skies, fly me home," does it? So we'll stick with tradition and pretend that planes can get down those tiny little country lanes a lot easier than even the smallest of cars can. And if planes can do it, then i'll have no more wining from you drivers about how difficult it is to edge your large 4-wheel-drive through the thicket of country shrubbery.

Again, nothing much went on today. I've job hunted, did a little bit of cleaning, played with the dog, went shopping, and, yet again, managed to avoid cooking by the speedy and timely arrival of a little mobile van serving chips and other horribly fattening goodies. I had chicken nuggets, chips and gravy, and only managed to get through about half of it before the sheer amount of oil and grease saw me defeated, and, if I admit it, rather sick. I grew up on this stuff, and absolutely loved it, but since i've lived in England, i've tended to oven cook my food wherever I can. Initially, this was only because I was afraid of the deep fat fryers and the scalding, dripping oil. But now, it's because I like the taste of the food better when it's done in the oven. I can't eat too much grease now without feeling ill. Pity really, as it tastes so good!

And that's it. Exciting, right? Now I need to pack my suitcase for going home rediculously early in the morning. I also need to order shopping to be delivered when I arrive home, or else i'll not be having dinner tomorrow night. More importantly, I need to finish a mountain of chocolate before I can leave here! So, stop distracting me. The removal of this hazardous food product is of great importance. I am only consuming it to prevent harm to others.

Happy Monday

A bit of an Oxymoron, don't you think? But mine has been happy so far. I've been lazy, yes, lazy. Didn't sleep in late though, thanks to the Mollster, but i've done nothing except lie around on my granny's rather posh reclining sofa, play solitaire on my computer, and eat lots of chocolate.

I went back to church last night, and didn't get home till about half 10. As i'm so old, I was tired right about then, but my granny, being the young spring chicken she is, sat up till 1! Eventually, I fell asleep in front of the computer waiting for her, and she took pity on me and went to bed.

So, here I am, stuffed with chocolate, cheese and corned beef toasties, and potato bread, with absolutely no idea of what to tell you today. The only thing of import I can think of is that i've been short listed for a job, a really good one. It's working in a special school with children who have CP (cerebral palsy). It's ideal actually. Means I can specialise quickly, and be paid at the level of my knowledge, not the time spent in the NHS. They don't work on a banded/graded system, as the hospitals do, so they pay you according to how well you perform. The interview has a practical element too, which is wonderful. Up until now, it's been all theory based which really makes me mad. I mean, how can you judge how well a therapist will perform in clinic by sitting down over a cup of tea (or water in my case), and asking them what they know and how they know it?

The interview's on the 10th of November, and i'll be working directly with the kids from 9:30 until 1:30. I'm looking forward to it. I'll need to dig out my smiley face and 'I was brave' stickers, and then find something for the kids to have as a reward! I even have a sticker that says, "I'm a big girl now". I'm considering putting it on my badge. It would be such a statement!

That's it, that's all I can think of to tell you. Oh, apart from the fact that the lodger has stolen my dog's affections! She even sneaked off to his bedroom with him while I was at church... It must be love!

I've also managed to miss the memorial service of a very dear friend, and one time tutor of mine. Also missed her funeral sadly, both times due to the fact that I was in Ireland. I thought it was on Wednesday, so booked an early flight. But as it turns out, it's tomorrow instead. I'm quite sad that i've missed it. Another friend down that direction's going through some difficult times too, so I really must get down that way soon, so that we can commiserate with each other, and perhaps even support one another! He's not allowed to get down in the dumps... He's one of my job referees! See? there was no alterior motive in that offer of support at all!

Anyway, i'm scraping the bottom of the barrel here for things to tell you, so like you probably have, i've decided i've had enough for the day. I might write more tomorrow, but then again, I might not! If you comment enough, i'll give you a fresh instalment. Do it... Do it now!

Dinner

I couldn't think of a better title, and i'm just about to have my dinner, so it seemed appropriate, all right?

There's really not much to tell about yesterday. Slept in till 9, then ate a yummy fried breakfast, played with the dog, and then it was off to church. They're having a harvest convention at the moment, so there was 2 services yesterday, both of which were good. I even got roped into singing last night!

It was an all day thing, with tea in between the two services. I even got Birthday cake, as it was one of the minister's birthdays... I had 2 pieces! Aren't I naughty?
Other than that, there really isn't much to tell. I came home, did a quick job check, then went to bed, only to get up early for the Sunday morning service this morning. I'm home only briefly now, as we have to be back there for 7. Molly hates me. She's huffing because I leave her behind when I go to church. She just gives me these looks of disdain, before trotting off to cuddle up with my Granny's lodger, who she took an instant liking to. I wish he'd walk her as well as play fighting with her!

Dinner today will be baby potatoes, good, fresh bacon, peas and gravy. Be jealous! And, if any of you are eating Yorkshire Puddings today, I too will be jealous. The Irish have never heard of them, so we don't get them here.

I managed to speak to a friend of mine last night who's just had a baby. I am also jealous of him! He's got a little one who's just 1, and another tinier one. Think of all the baby loving he can do! The baby was healthy though, which is great, and, in his native tongue, the boy's second name means Storm. Talk about making a statement with a name! He did cause quite a storm with his arrival, I can tell ya.

And Kudos to my followers... All 1 of you! Thank you for commenting, faithful, lone reader. You other thousands, nay, milions, who read this should follow his example, or feel my wrath! Go on, tell me how much you hate me... I love it!

home, home on the range

Where the cows and the horses do play? Hmmmm, that sounds wrong somehow. But i'm there, home, in the very near vicinity of fields full of the things! Isn't their stink wonderful? "It keeps the lungs healthy," my Grandad used to say, and perhaps more worryingly, when we kids complained loudly about the stink as we drove through the country, "It'll put hairs on your chest."

With that frightening possibility in mind, I didn't moan about the eau de perfume of cattle, sheep, pigs, horses, the odd elephant and a mountain lion, as myself and my aunty drove up to Belfast to pick up our American friends for a day of castle touring, and of course, the obligatory shopping. We've known the dad for about 10 years, but this was the first time i'd met his daughter. She's the quietest 14-year-old i've ever met. She didn't say boo to a goose, although that's hardly surprising, as we don't usually carry geese in the car with us.

So off we trooped, to Carrick Fergus castle. Being slightly more mature than when I was 8, and last there, I was actually able to appreciate some of the history behind the place. So here goes.

It was built in 1190 by John De Coursey, about 10 years after the Normans started building them all over Ireland. As far as I can remember, the Normans were the first to conquer us. Up until that point, all would be overthrowers had glanced across the Irish sea, and thought, "sod this. It's too cold and rainy over there." Sensible people, I say. But, here came those weather tough Normans, and they got us. King John, 20 years later, decided he didn't like the position of the castle, as it guarded the seas too well. So he sent irl De Lacy over to "sort out the boys". De Lacy took one look at the place, and liked it so much he made himself at home. After 20 years, the king wondered why he didn't come back. Old kingy was a bit slow if it took him that long to realise his plans hadn't, if you'll pardon the lame and cheesy punn, gone to plan!
Edward De Bruce was the next person to take it over, but only after a long siege which saw the inhabitants of the castle forced to eating those of De Bruce's men they managed to trap. They fled in the end, leaving the castle for De Bruce. After that, it's not really clear what happened. The videos that showed us all this were made for kids, and were woefully lacking in detail. But, to this day, the castle stands. I had a real good look at it all, and even climbed into a crevace in one of the walls to see how thick it was. It was about 6 ft thick! I'll post photos if I can get some off my aunty. There's some of the gorgeous views over the sea too.

Once the Americans had taken more photos than you could shake a USB stick at (yes, their camera is digital, and I am clever!), we headed back into civilisation. I say civilisation, because Belfast has shops, and shops =a desirable place to live. We didn't spend too long there though, as the oldies were tired from all the walking. I did manage to get my hands on sweeties though, really old ones like shrimps and milions. It was one of those sweetshops that has the sweets in jars all round the edges. I haven't seen one of those in years!

Once i'd squirrelled away my purchases, we jumped back in the car and dropped them off with the people they were staying with. Then it was a quick stop at the chinese to prevent our bellies from complaining, and home to a Molly who went absolutely mad to see me.

And that's it, oh so avid reader. Substitute avid for bored, if it fits better. I suspect it might! Now, go and enjoy that good country air. Oh, watch out for that elephant!

The Eagle Has Landed

Wait, did I fly on an eagle? Blast that Dementia; I forget so much! That's what happens when you're 21, nearly 22. Eagles are awfully advanced now though; they have air hostesses and everything!

You'll be glad, or perhaps disappointed, to know that I arrived safely late last night. Yes, dear reader, 10 PM is late when you're as old as I. The day started off well enough. I managed to get all the housework done before I left, and even got my jeans dry that i'd forgotten to wash until 11 the night before, and which I wanted to wear during travelling. Molly, as usual, hid when she realised that she'd have to work for her keep, but once she got going, she worked like an absolute trooper, despite the suitcase she had to look out for as well. As usual, we got to the bus stop just as the bus was about 5 feet from the kerb, and, as usual, he didn't stop to let us on. So we passed a nice 15 minutes waiting for the next bus, while I sweated about missing my train. I made it in the end, due in no small part to how well Molly worked. She even found the help desk first time!

We had to go to Paddington, which took an hour. Molly wasn't thrilled to say the least, as she couldn't sprawl under a table and laze around. Instead, she was packed under a seat, and let me know, through grumbling and throwing herself about, that she was not happy! I was expecting her to huff, but she didn't, and worked brilliantly all the way through the underground and up to the next train, where she made fast friends with another passenger on the train to the airport. He took it all in good humor, which I was glad of, because she attached herself to him like a limpit! Ended up sitting under his seat and everything. So we swapped dog stories for half an hour, and moaned about the state of the economy, the government, and the world in general... It was great! Cheered me up no end!

I got to the airport in plenty of time, and got all the boring check in and paperwork done for check in. I can't believe how good the dog was all the way through. She didn't even fuss when I fitted her into her flight harness which she usually hates. Slept most of the way through the flight, and then worked brilliantly, finding my aunty in the crowd and everything. It's on days like that that I really appreciate the extra independence we get as a good, working team.

My aunty's soft with animals, and even let her sprawl on the back seat of the car, instead of in the boot where she usually goes. As usual, we stopped for chips on the way home, and we were very very naughty and even got ice cream! With strawberry sauce!

After that, it was plain sailing, well, driving, all the way home. I'm there now, staying with my Granny, and working on my cruddy old laptop which runs so hot that I think it's blistering my leg! So, I don't think i'm going to write much more, as third degree burns aren't my idea of a desirable way to spend a holiday. I'll try and update daily, but I expect i'll be quite busy here, catching up with the family, and some friends that we have over from America. Until next time!

Daily updatees?

Ahem, who ever said anything, in their first post, about updating daily? Not me, i'm sure! I have a good excuse for it this time. But first, to the bank.

I went down there on Saturday to try and take my savings out of the none too stable bank. I'd rather have them gathering dust under my matress than frozen in a liquidised bank somewhere, even if they are worthless when inflation sky rockets. I know that the government say they'll protect my money up to 50 thousand, but firstly, the forecast time it will take to go through the admin to give people their money back is three months, and secondly, Iceland made a similar, if smaller, guarantee to Brits who invested in IceSafe and Kaupthing. When their banks went bust, they said "Well, we're sorry. We don't have enough money so we're not giving you yours back." So, bearing all that in mind, I decided that I wanted to hear the crackle of crisp notes in my grubby little fingers.

I had a web saver account, and thought that, if I told them I was closing it, they'd give me the balance straight away. Turns out they don't any more. So, the only way to get the money out is to transfer it to my current account and withdraw from there, i'm told. I do this, so now, the sneaky bank have made me pay off an overdraft with that money sitting there. Then, she tells me that there's a daily limit on withdrawals which means i'll have to come back 4 days on the trot to get all of my savings. "Why didn't you tell me this before I transfered?" I want to know, to which she has no good answer. I tell her I want the money in cash, and she says she can write me a cheque, a banker's draught. Um, hello? I'd have to pay that into my current account to get the cash! So we're right back at square 1 here, aren't we?

After a lot of interrogation *pins on MI5 badge*, I managed, through cunning trick questions, to learn that I could put in a cash order, but that it would take at least 48 hours for them to have the cash. Yes folks, I am so rich that the bank doesn't have enough money to pay me! Grovel at my highly polished, very expensive, custom made boots! or the pair of grubby old Sketcher trainers that I got on special offer, take your pick.

So, I requested the cash order, and was told by some old battle axe of a manager that I couldn't have the money until next Saturday. Um, didn't you just say 48 hours? no? Ah, don't worry, it's my old age kicking in... The dementia, you know. But even old people can shout, and shout I did, asking them for policy to back up this spurious time period, which they couldn't provide. The upshot was that I sailed in there yesterday morning, and scooped my fat wad of cash from under the nose of the same old witch... And she had the cheek to say "See you again soon." as I left. See me soon? I don't think so, unless of course, you read Heat. I'll be on the front cover of there next month for being one of the richest people in the world.

Ok, so it was a thin wad. My conscience is too good to lie to you, dear reader. Aren't I such a model to look up to? Yes, send your children to learn at my knee... If you want slightly deranged and unstable kids, that is.

After I got home from the bank, I had a look for jobs for about the 50th time that day, and, shock horror, I found 2! Yes, not 1 but 2. I grabbed my pen, and started to scribble furiously and diligently. I made some nice designs on my desk, but surprisingly, it didn't get the online application form filled in! After that, I resulted to the terribly old fashioned method of simply typing my answers, and that seemed to get the job done. Old technology's far more reliable than these new-fangled devices. Pens are far too complex for this simple gal.

I've found a new addiction, and it goes by the name of Solitaire. Nope, not a new street drug, but the wonderful, horribly adicting card game. My mum has the blame for this placed squarely on her shoulders, has the sole responsibility for my new, dependent, status. She introduced me to it last week and I thought I wouldn't like it initially. But now, i'm as hooked as the cod on the end of 6 fishing lines who ate every worm because his mum didn't feed him breakfast that morning. That means i'm really hooked!

But something really exciting happened yesterday. I was due to go home, Northern Ireland that is, for something i'd arranged to do ages ago, but didn't think I could afford to go. When I called them to let them know, they told me they'd pay for my flights. I found out at about 5 last night, and i'm leaving at 1 today. A whirlwind which looked oddly Carly shaped, was released on my house. It packed quicker than I ever have before, but if you asked me what i'd put in my suitcase, I don't think I could tell you. What I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, is that it left a *lot* of mess behind it. It's understandable I suppose; whirlwinds have such a strong backlash, but i had words with it this morning! I hope I have everything I need! I definitely have my toothbrush though, and, as long as I have that, and a towel of course, i'll survive. And, if you haven't read the HitchHiker's Guide to the Galaxy, you'll not have a clue what i'm talking about with towels. If so, don't worry, it's just an oldy thing. If you've read it, where's my kudos for fitting it into a post! Oh, and pull up a pee stained chair; you're now officially considered ancient by the kids, who tell me, "You're soooo not hip Carly, because you haven't got a Facebook account." Well, I do actually, so there!

After I packed, I filled in another job application, but this one wasn't for a physio job. It's for a post assessing visually impaired people for appropriate technology in schools and employment. Of course, I won't get it. Jaded? Nope, just cynical. Anyway, I don't have the qualifications they want. I'm applying on the off-chance that they'll think life experience with this technology is far better than theory teaching in a classroom. I'm sure you'll agree with most sensible, well run organisations, that life experience counts for nothing, especially if you're proficient in whatever it is they're looking for. You can't possibly know it completely without a bit of paper to say you do!

After that, it was chocolate (Galaxy Cookie Crumble), phone calls, and bed.

I'd just like to point out that i'm showing my dedication to you, well, kind of anyway. It was before 7 when I started writing this! Yes, that's commitment. Or is it a person's way of passing time when they can't sleep? I'm pleading the fifth, I think.

Sorry!

For I must say sorry, as i've been very bad indeed! You know why? Because I didn't update my blog once while i was away. I've slapped myself on the wrist already, so please don't feel the need to do it for me... once was bad enough!

I did, believe it or not, have a reasonably good excuse for not updating you. There isn't much to tell! I arrived safe and sound at mum's work where I was supposed to meet her, and, shock horror, the trains actually ran on time so I was early! yes folks, you heard it here first, English public transport does occasionally work the way it was promised to!

"So, what to do?" I thought, having arrived a whole hour early. Well, there was only one thing for it. I sneakied into Burger King to wile away the time by having an intimate relationship with a chicken burger and chips... I think i've found my other half!

In the end I met mum, and, after she too had committed the hanus crime of indulging in a BK, we trapsed off home with every intention of going to a pub quiz. However, the leur of new laptops, cruddy old music, and a warm house kept us very firmly indoors.

The next day, we were supposed to cook but again, the cunningness of comfy beds, girlie chatter and turkey drummers and waffles beguiled us with honeyed words. We tried to cook, honest we did! But those wiley distractions were having none of it!

After some quick thinking and fast talking, we managed to escape their clutches long enough to hightail it to the supermarket for some essentials like: 3 bars of chocolate, coconut biscuits, rice crispies and sausage rolls. Well, it was such hard work choosing which type of chocolate to buy that we thought we deserved a drink. The pub was very close, so really, it would have been rude to just walk past it...

We did manage to make it home, and even to cook! We had yummy chicken supreme with some weird pasta/potato stuff that I can't spell, and rice crispy buns and banana bread topped it off just nicely. We also had a friend over, and it's her fault that I didn't sleep until about 2 in the morning!

The next day, the dreaded interview day, wasn't too promising. I'm not gonna go into mega detail here, as it still makes me cringe to think about it. I spent the whole morning biting my nails to the quick, pacing, and generally being a nervous wreck as I am before all interviews. The dreaded wrinkles in the suit were removed by hanging it for a while, and, once on, you wouldn't know it had spent the last 3 days of its life in a rucksack. My boots? Oh, I thought they were great at the start of the morning, but, by the time I got home, I swore i'd never wear heels ever again.

So, off I go in the taxi, after he's refused to knock on the door because I have a dog, and he's Asian (no, i'm not being racist here... Merely stereotypical!) We're about 5 minutes late, but it's Ok; i've left time for that. We even get to the hospital on time. But here's where the fun starts. The man, despite me telling him the name of the building repeatedly, doesn't know where he's going. We stop for directions no less than 3 times, each stop taking us about 5 minutes. By this point, i'm really panicking that we're going to be late, and wondering how the third set of directions will help him any more than the first. Each person told us the same thing and, each time, he drove the wrong way. In the end, he brought a woman to the car to drive with us and show us where to go... and he still couldn't drive the right way!

On the other side of the hospital from where we needed to be, and with only 5 minutes to spare, I asked the woman if she'd walk it with me. The taxi man even had the cheek to over charge me! So, out we got, and ran the 10 minute walk in under 5 minutes... Can you see now why I hate heels? But wait, it gets better! We arrived, just on time, to a deserted block. Yes, there was nobody waiting for me, and no clear signing as to where the interview was taking place. After a while, we disturbed someone's lunch to ask them to call for us... Turns out, HR, that oh so helpful and efficient department, had given me the wrong building for the interview! "Where were you supposed to go!" I here you scream (or is that the voices in my head again?) Can you guess? Yep, right round the other side of the hospital... Right where I was initially!

So, yet again, we ran the 10 minute walk in 5 minutes. By this point, I was hot, sweaty, out of breath, and 10 minutes late for my interview; so late in fact that one of the pannel was waiting outside for me. For the first 5 minutes of my very short interview, I could hardly talk due to breathlessness. The dog wouldn't sit still. I had my rucksack with me, through not having the time to leave it at reception... The list goes on. And I didn't know the answers to two of the questions they asked me!

Perhaps unsurprisingly, they didn't offer me the job, although I was rather glad, as the rotations they offer are really rubbish, and not at all what was stated on the job description, and St George's hospital doesn't look the nicest place to work. Apparently, it also has a pretty bad reputation. So, stuff you Georgey, I didn't want to work there anyway!

But wait! Hold on to your seats folks! The fun isn't over yet. The tube trains are next. Usually, it's a breeze to get to the train station to go home to Oxford. Today, I jumped on the tube, and settled in for a long journey, which was cut short when the driver informed us of a signal failure. I was going to have to get off at an earlier station and change twice rather than once. "Typical," I thought, in a semi-jaded fashion, "But it's all right, at least i'll still get home." We were sailing along quite nicely, when they then told us that the train was terminating in 2 stations' time. Ok, so i'll just get off and wait on the next tube that's going through to my station. Which I did. Again, it was chuntering along, as tubes generally do, and then, it stopped. Yep, just stopped. For 10 minutes. We were told that, just in front of us, there was yet another signal failure and that we were stuck. We couldn't go forward because the track points weren't working, and we couldn't go backwards for some unknown, but probably valid, reason. So there we sat, for about 40 minutes while people tried to fix the track. Eventually, I did make it to my station, and even to the train station. I even caught the train to Oxford without a hitch! But, when I went outside to grab the taxi i'd ordered, turns out that the controller hadn't passed on the message that i'd have a dog with me. The taxis like to put a blanket down to keep her hairs off the car, but I was lucky. I knew this one, so he didn't argue and fight about taking me, blanketless as I was. Thankfully, I arrived home in one piece, at the end of a very long, very tiring day.

Ok, so perhaps there was a little more to update you on than I thought. And i haven't even got to the weekend yet! There really isn't much to tell here. Lazy days in the house, dog walks, fighting with my bank... But i'll leave the fight until tomorrow, as that's when i'll discover if i've been successful or not. Until then, comment, or else!

me so far.

October 8th

Hurray, Hurray, it's a Holli holiday!

Well, not really, but it's still exciting. I'm going up to London to see my mum today, and spend a couple of days with her. I'm using the job interview that i have on Friday as an excuse to go up there, but really, I can't wait to see her. We haven't seen each other since my graduation on the 12th of September. The other reason i'm so excited is that she always has chocolate! Yes mum, this is the real reason why I love you, so share!

But, back to the job interview. I have it at 1 PM on Friday, and it lasts a grand total of half an hour. Is this the NHS ticking its "We interview disabled people too" Box? Who knows! I'm going in with the attitude that it isn't though, even though the interview's so short. So, how do I wow them in half an hour? By my dazzling charm and good looks, of course! Not to mention my quick wit and super smile. Well, someone's got to love me!

So i've ironed, yes, you read that right, I ironed! My suit and shirt, then grumbled loud and long at the fact that neither would fold without wrinkling. I did the best I could, stuffed suit, shirt, boots, other clothes, and of course my perfume, all into a rucksack, and now, i'm ready to go! Ready, that is, if you discount the fact that i'm still wearing my pink slippers. you must also ignore the fact that Molly, sensing that she'll actually have to do some work today, is feigning absolute exhaustion, curled into a tight ball right in the very corner of her bed. She's such a funny dog. Let's hope she decides that working is a good idea, else the train station might just elude my seeking, this day. Toodle pip, until i get back.

October 7th

Introduction

Ok, so who am I, and what's the point in you reading my inane ramblings?

The answer to both these questions is simple. Firstly, I am Carly, a 21-year-old physiotherapist from the Oxfordshire area. And the answer to the second? There is absolutely no point whatsoever, unless, of course, you need an excuse to procrastonate at work for a few minutes each day. Ah, did I say procrastonate? What I meant to say was, read something deeply interesting, educational, and integral to the continued existence of the company you work for. Aren't you a good employee!

So, what's the purpose of the blog? It has no higher purpose i'm afraid; none beyond that of the usual blog, anyway. It's to let people know how i'm getting on, and, perhaps more importantly, to keep my own brain amused and stimulated while I go through the headache of job hunting. At the minute, due to this recession and NHS budget cuts, physiotherapy jobs, already thin on the ground, are almost impossible to find. Back in the summer, I was applying for about 7 or 8 a week on average. This week i've only found 1. I need some real luck if i'm to secure this single job for my good self.

But, do i even want to work in physio any more? The thought has plagued me with worrying regularity over the last month or so. Do i really want to struggle for the whole of my career with lifting people, cajoling them to do exercises they blatantly have no intention of doing, put old, arthritic, miserably unhappy stroke patients through repetative actions that they feel are pointless at the time? Do I want to struggle to find a job, struggle to prove to my work colleagues that a blind person can do it just as well as they, struggle to keep it when the recession really hits?

But then, you have the other side of the proverbial coin. The thanks and satisfaction you get after suctioning someone whose lungs are so full of phlegm and gunk that they couldn't breathe. The gratitude from parents and family when they see their child be enabled to crawl like any other kid of their age. The self satisfaction you get when you make a lonely, unhappy, scared elderly person feel better about their life and themselves through enabling them to be mobile enough to get to the shops again. There is no easy answer to my quandery, but I suppose it gives me something to ponder on, in between making job applications.

So, what can i tell you about my day? I slept late this morning (Naughty Carly!). Well, late, if you count 9 AM as late. Usually i'm up at 8 on the dot, with the guide dog, Molly, running in circles around me, attempting, to the best of her ability, to wag her tail right through the walls of the house! I've never seen a dog who can hit you with their tail with the force that Molly musters when she's excited or if there's the slightest chance that food will be offered as a reward for such exuberance. Once i'd distracted the raging beast with a good sized bowl of doggy biscuits, and slipped stealthily out of the range of the whip tail, it was time to begin the daily ritual of job hunting. Nothing presented itself this morning, so, as usually happens, i filled the time in between checking by logging onto a roleplay game i play over the internet. I'll tell you more about my character on there another time.

At about 11, when my belly started threatening to eat itself if I didn't feed it, I grabbed the first thing I could find in the fridge which happened to be a rather yummy tuna, garlic mayo, sweetcorn and cheese wrap. Yes, i'm still a student at heart, so don't bat an eyelid at eating stuff like this for breakfast.

With the belly appeased, it was a quick jaunt back to the computer to see if a job had presented itself. nope, still nothing. So, i'll have to find something else to fill my day with.

Anyway, that's all I have to tell at the minute. I told you it would be exciting! Until tomorrow, be good. Don't forget to leave a comment... whenever i work out how to give you the option of doing so, that is.